After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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