Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize