508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Randomize
