Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
