You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
