so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize