I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Randomize
