your room smells of hookers.
And success
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Who died my cat blue again?
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
