I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
