I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
