Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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