I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Randomize
