I want to stick my p in your. b.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
