Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
