Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
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