i may or may not be watching the land before time
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
