Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Randomize
