I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
