it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
