we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Randomize
