I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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