Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Randomize
