Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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