Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
