farters have to be the big spoon...
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
