Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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