these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
