Having a random hookup so left but love u
I can text with my tongue
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
