you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
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