can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
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