But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
Randomize
