is your mom at the bar?
Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
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