I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
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