he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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