would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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