Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
