yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
