do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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