Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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