I seem to have left my pride at pride
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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