Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
Randomize
