did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
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