only if we run a train.
done.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
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