you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
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