I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
It's Friday. Sex?
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
bring money and cleavage
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
There's always time for handjobs
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
