Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
Randomize
