just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
Randomize