Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
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