i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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