Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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